I have just had an unbelievably horrible morning. This has been a long term with too much going on. The stress of trying to keep all the balls in the air is getting to me. I think there have also been too many weekends when we are busy all day Saturday and all day Sunday. I need some time just to do nothing, and not have to drive anywhere or make any phone calls or run any errands or think about house extensions or arrange play dates or go to school events or keep doctors appointments or socialise with anyone. This morning I ended up yelling at the entire family. Our cleaning lady has been off too and the mess-stress always makes things worse and no matter how many dishes I wash or loads of laundry I do, ten times more instantly take their place. I'm in awe of people who work and run a family and manage housework without help.

The US disaster has also had a big effect on me. Everything just seems so heavy and hopeless at times like these. So much suffering in so many parts of the world. I, in my cushioned little world, simply have no idea of the typical human experience.

Got to try and shake myself out of it. Also got to write a story for the writing group as we are meeting soon. Also got to start thinking about characters for children's books as Janine (graphic artist friend) is very very keen.

At the weekend we spent Saturday with my parents and my brother and his wife for my Dad's 74th birthday. We spent Sunday in the Kamberg region with a friend who bought a gorgeous piece of land a few years ago and has now built a little house there - a wooden house on stilts with a rain water tank at the back and a fireplace with a tall chimney. The kids had lots of fun bounding about the place. The weather was a bit cool and windy, so we didn't swim this time. There's both a dam and a stretch of river on the land - will be cool if we can get some tubes to ride down the river.